Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Here's my kids name and address - please kidnap them

(Originally Posted 03/05/2011)

Bet that post title got your attention!
So before I begin this muse, I have actually had several people ask when I am going to post again.  I have been working on a bad ass post titled "Dear Mr. President (and related underlings)" and its a good 'un (I actually say "What the hell are you doing up Weinerberger Way?"), so I have been spending a lot of time on it.  So to those of you anxiously waiting on the edge of your desk chair for my next meaningless bit of drivel, here is something to hold you over...
I was driving to work this morning, and I see yet another one of those cutesy family decals.  You know, the ones that have the little stick figures with the family name, the names of every person in the family, the dogs name, the cats name, the goldfish's name, the parakeets name, the neighbor's second cousin's hairdressers name, etc.  It blows my mind that people (especially people with kids) do this!  Even worse are those decals that have the kids name, the sport/activities they participate in, and the name of the school they go to.  This is like putting a big sign on top of your car that says
"Here is my kids name and where they go to school.  Please come kidnap them.  Oh, and if school time in inconvenient for you, please write down my license plate number so  you can look up my address and come to my house where my kids are and rob me while you at it."
Let me translate a few of these for you...

This lovely family goes so far as to NOT give the mom and dads name (how convenient), but little Mike, Jill and John Jones are not so lucky!  Even more so, John is a younger un, meaning that he doesn't know enough to run when someone say "Lil John...would you like some candy?"  "Mom" and "Dad" may hafta peel one of those decals off soon...or just put a big red X over it so future psycho's know that ones already taken.

Ah, this lovely presentation is a ripe example of a calling card for a sicko.  This one says "Hi!  My son play Soccer!  His name is Dennis.  Since he is a soccer player for the high school, you can bet he's in great shape.  Go check him out!  If you not sure which one he is, just go to JHS after the last bell rings and hang around the soccer field.  Call his name out like your a fan!  Heck, I bet some of the other kids and pedophiles will point him out for you!

This family goes one step further and says "If young boys aren't your thing, then my Michael might not be for you.  But, heck!  I got a young girl for you!  She goes to the same school as Michael, and her name is Arabella!  She will be the one wearing the tights in the Gym.  Just ask for her!"

Not all of these are so bad!  This one is actually kinda funny.  Especially "Jack"!  It still gives away too much information (I have a young boy and girl, and mom looks like a blond ditz and dad, well, dad doesn't have too much going on upstairs!) and I can easily find you via License Plate.

I'm just saying.  There are some SICK SICK SICK people in this world!  Get a clue, people!
Go forth and do great things (and I will get that President post out asap!)
*PS - I got all of theses images from the Internet via Google Images.  If they belong to you and you are not happy with me using them, then let me know...I will find someone else's to use and show off their art instead.  Just saying.
*PPS - I just noticed that I now have 23 people registered for my blog!  NICE!  And mom is one of them!  Thanks, Mom!  :)

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